Crystal Palace v Coventry

I have had better nights.

Actually nights at the Palace are rarely great. First novelty this evening was the steward who normally searches fans just asked me if I had any keys on me. "Of course I have" I spluttered. "How do you expect anyone to get through their front door without carrying keys?" "Sorry, don't shoot the messenger" retorts the steward. "I am only doing what I am told." So what useless cretin thought it would be worth asking that? What are they going to do if one says yes? Confiscate 10,000 front door keys for fear we use them as offensive weapons?

Then having got in the next steward told me that the seat for which I had a ticket I couldn't use because they had closed the section off. So I could sit anywhere in this section, but if I sat in a seat for which someone did actually have a ticket I would just have to move. Again, how gormless can one be to sell tickets in a half empty stadium for seats you won't let anyone sit in? The point of course being that clubs can't be arsed with fans at all on the basis we will put up with any crap. Including fencing off all the best seats and sticking fans in a corner.

And crap of course is what we got for the next 90 minutes. Well to be fair, for the next 45 minutes, which were utterly, desperately dire. I really don't think there was a shot on target the whole half. It wasn't so much that Coventry played defensively. We were sort of attacking, but what we were attacking was not the opposing goal but the centre circle. Some nice neat approach play up to the half-way line but never really got into the other half. And certainly not the penalty area. Just woeful.

Then in the second half we completely fluked an early goal. A hopeful punt forward was deflected and the ball really just bounced in. Palace defence just panicked at the sudden sight of this spherical object appearing out of nowhere in their box, a completely novel experience for them. Unfortunately going a goal down led to them actually attacking, so we faced a stream of corners but against all odds it seemed we might actually hold out. And just as I was contemplating our jammiest win in 35 years, they scored two goals in stoppage time. Disconsolately we trooped out into the milieu of happy Palace fans. Not a good night.

We had fielded a team with three 17 year olds and an 18 year old, so can't be surprised at our 4th defeat in 10 days. But frankly if I am watching a schoolboy team I don't feel I should be charged £25. Or anything at all really.

On the bright side...well it didn't rain