The Saturdays
First up on the main stage were the Saturdays. Now I heard two blokes in front of me saying that when you had heard one Saturdays song you had heard them all. Enough said. Just the start of a horrible low quality pop run on the mains stage, including Olly Murs and Scouting for Girls, so once more I took refuge in the comedy tent.
Paul Choudhry
First up Paul Choudhry. Being an Asian comic by descent, a bit obsessed with the race card, but a confident enough performer and some nice cheap gags. "Any Polish people in? No. Good. That's what we need. They are all out working for us."
Elis James
Elis James is a young Welsh comic. Struggled a bit with material. Best stuff was on being mistaken for a previous girlfriend of Harry Styles (similar names not appearance). But it was a bit laboured.
Fredrik Andersson
Then Fredrik Andersson. He is the second Swedish comic I have seen, which says a lot about the quality of Swedes' English. But even so that was the barrier. Unlike say Eddie Izzard who sounds like he makes it up as he goes along, there was something so polished about Fred that I imagine he had learned the whole routine word perfect. But that was the problem. He had lots of admirable material, really good gags but delivered just a little too deadpan. "I've broken up with my girlfriend. We had an open relationship. She didn't like it when she found out."
"I am not a good person. I fed cold spaghetti through my neighbour's letter-box. I thought she must have been a really bad person in a previous life top have deserved this."
"I used to go out with an Asian girl. She had to go home to see her parents. I picked her up at the airport, but things weren't quite right between us. It was only when e were in bed it dawned on me I had picked up the wrong girl at the airport."
Jon Richardson
But this run in the comedy tent was really to set me up for the star of the day, Jon Richardson. I had never seen him live before, but he was brilliant. He had the perfect combination of good material and great delivery. One always tends to like self-deprecating humour. "I'm just a really boring guy. Even my dreams are boring. In my dreams I could be shagging the most beautiful women in the world. But what did I dream about last week? Going back to my old house and tidying the loft."
Also some nice observational stuff about hitting one's Thirties. "You know you are getting old when you have to plan Jaeger bombs in advance."
McFly
Ok enough comedy. This is a music festival. And I was getting horribly stiff sitting on the ground. So off to an unlikely band to see, McFly. Now you have to get past the boy band stuff. Yes they have grown up as children's entertainers, but compared to most of the lightweights around at V, these chaps can actually rock. And a nice atmosphere in my one and only venture to the Arena Tent. One reason for this is its quite a trek back to the Main Stage, as I quickly realised to my cost. Trying to cross at the back of the second stage in front of the bars the crowd just became impossibly jammed with equal numbers of other folk trying to come the other way. And though there were zillions of stewards about there were none when they could have been of some actual use.
Anyway, suffice to say at this stage I was feeling severely disgruntled and vowing not to do another year. Which from then on melted away.
The Vaccines
First I finally made it to the Main Stage to see the excellent Vaccines. A proper indie rock band with a couple of good albums behind them.
Maximo Park
Then back to the second stage to catch Maximo Park. Not seen this outfit for a little while, but they were as good as ever. Energetic, and as they commented, a band that actually played there instruments and sang. Justly they felt odd ones out being sandwiched between Rudimental and Kendrik Lamar.
Stereophonics
Then it was time for me to flog back to the Main Stage for the Stereophonics. And this is where my mood really took off. The Stereopohonics set was the best of the weekend. Kelly Jones is about 40 now, but he still has it all - a real rock sensibility but now with a terrific long back catalogue. And I love his old fashioned rock introductions - no long chat with the crowd, but just the title of the next song. Cool. And the crowd around me was just so much nicer than the Beyonce gathering. Much more fun, and less "fan".
In the gap between Stereophonics and Kings of Leon a little bunch of us down the front got talking, notably a very extrovert chap in his early thirties I guess, a couple of nice young girls in front of me and a teenage lad with a couple of his mates to the left. The chap in his thirties was a great laugh, but being caught short, he proceeded to urinate in his paper beer cup in front of us, making jokes about "anyone got experience in wrestling with a boa constrictor?" and then flirting with the girl. So we got on to what we all did, and the girl was at college, and then it came to him, and he was.... a teacher! Or, as the teenage lad said with undisguised incredulity "You're a TEACHER?!?" (Sorry that is as near as I can put it in writing. You had to be there!)
Kings of Leon
Kings of Leon were fine, but I would make the same observation as I ad done when I last saw them headlining V. They are perfunctory in going through their material on stage. Its good stuff but you are as well to sat at home and listen to the CDs.
But overall an enjoyable evening and I left in good spirits. Then another barmy incident. A very drunk young Irishman approached me on the way out and asked if I knew where he could get a taxi. I said that his best bet would be to get the shuttle bus back to the station, so I saw him onto the bus - and proceeded to get his life story, which involved him just having broken up with his girlfriend at the festival, that he had given up his well-paid job in Australia to come and live with her in Essex, that his in-laws were well dodgy, that he should have stuck with his first love in Ireland...All the stuff you don't expect to tell a stranger, unless very drunk. I think when he heard I was a lawyer he also offered me his services as personal bodyguard (on the grounds that he was brought up in Belfast). I feel he had learnt a little too much about lawyers from John Grisham novels!
No comments:
Post a Comment